Just Two Little Fish

I come into the presence of my Father, empty-handed, basking in His grace and His greatness. There is nothing more I must do to earn His affection, but like the daughter I am I want to please my Heavenly Daddy. 

Yet, I come empty-handed.  I am a small, simple soul—perhaps too small.  Words spoken to casual acquaintances don’t come easily, so perhaps I am too ill-equipped to share my story. 

I live a simple life—perhaps too simple.  I don’t have a fancy house or a vast social network to help me change the world.  

Yes, perhaps I am too small.  Perhaps I am not enough to be used.  The thing that makes me crave my Father’s grace becomes the very thing that keeps my voice silent and my desire to serve in the shadows.

But isn’t that just how Satan works?  His most powerful lies are those that take something true and corrupt it and twist it little by little until we confuse the lie for reality.  

Have you, like me, struggled with this twisted perception of who we are in Christ?  That somehow our “smallness” makes us unusable in the Kingdom of God?  

Take heart!  God is in the business of using the small, the simple, the hidden.  God is in the business of using women like us. 

Consider when Jesus fed the 5,000.  It’s such a familiar story.  John 6:9 says, “There is a boy here who has five barley loaves and two fish, but what are they for so many?”

Can you see it?  There are thousands of people.  There is one small boy.  This crowd is hungry, and there are five loaves of bread—barley bread, the bread of the poor—and two small fish.

Do you see the absurdity of the situation?  Andrew saw it.  Hear the dismissal in his words, “But what are they for so many?”

Not enough. 

That’s what they were. Too small.  Not enough.

Until they were enough.

Oh, friend.  Look at what happens when we put our too small and not enough in the hands of Jesus!  The crowd not only ate, they ate till they were full and food was still left over.

Sister, I am the boy with the fish!  When I come to God, I look down at the meager offering in my hands and think, “Not enough.”  But God doesn’t need me to be enough because He is enough!  God is glorified in using the not enough because it so clearly points to His abundance.  

So. . . my house that is too small?  I offer it anyway and, with God’s abundance, fill it with love.

The words awkwardly spoken?  I speak them anyway and, with God’s goodness, fill them with encouragement.

These thoughts in my head, that make me feel vulnerable and exposed?  I type them anyway, hoping that in the hands of my loving, limitless God they will be multiplied and feed a hungry soul.  

What are your loaves and fish?  What piece of yourself do you long to offer to God, but your fear the not enough?  Offer it anyway.  And let God be enough.  

Prayer:  Father, thank you for being a loving and limitless God! Help us to remember that in your hands, the smallest of offerings can be magnified and multiplied into not just enough, but more than enough!  Give us the courage to take our “two small fish” and place them in Your hands, trusting You to make them enough.   –Amen

Until next time,

Shelby